bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
