So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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