Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Randomize