He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
is wine microwaveable?
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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