apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
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i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
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NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
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