Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
