The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize