Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  he puts the penis in happiness.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): he puts the penis in happiness. http://tfl.nu/m0tk
  Replies (29) Good night (4899) Bad night (753)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months. http://tfl.nu/qynd
  Replies (39) Good night (733) Bad night (9628)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit. http://tfl.nu/xfz2
  Replies (17) Good night (1186) Bad night (3905)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed. http://tfl.nu/5k49
  Replies (20) Good night (6920) Bad night (1346)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right? http://tfl.nu/n56d
  Replies (10) Good night (4581) Bad night (1722)
• Favorite

  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (321): as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels. http://tfl.nu/o5u7
  Replies (5) Good night (3917) Bad night (851)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities http://tfl.nu/wabu
  Replies (6) Good night (3329) Bad night (899)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it. http://tfl.nu/dgh5
  Replies (13) Good night (1133) Bad night (3346)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor. http://tfl.nu/v2bs
  Replies (7) Good night (1718) Bad night (848)
• Favorite

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (865): if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to http://tfl.nu/lehr
  Replies (8) Good night (1547) Bad night (665)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.

  (1-405): View more from Oklahoma

  Does he think you're psycho?

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Officially...... yes.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (405): I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new. (1-405): Does he think you're psycho? (405): Officially...... yes. http://tfl.nu/uyur
  Replies (8) Good night (1611) Bad night (547)
• Favorite

  (523): View more from

  I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (523): I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower http://tfl.nu/3y30
  Replies (4) Good night (751) Bad night (309)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut. http://tfl.nu/pq6k
  Replies (3) Good night (676) Bad night (446)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (701): Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead. http://tfl.nu/7ubq
  Replies (0) Good night (627) Bad night (313)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (916): I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats http://tfl.nu/tjrl
  Replies (2) Good night (485) Bad night (362)

Randomize