maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
