So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
