My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
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She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
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