Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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