I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize
