She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
