i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
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