Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
