dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
