I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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