who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
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