I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
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Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
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Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
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