at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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