the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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