Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Randomize
