It's Friday. Sex?
Banned from zoo.
Again?
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
