Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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