She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
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