Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Randomize
