I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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