The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
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