So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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