Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize