I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize