Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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