I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
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