i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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