What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
