So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
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she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
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he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
How external is "for external use only"?
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
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