I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
