okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
