White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Is her dick bigger than yours?
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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