Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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