Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30