i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
