There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
