yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
