so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
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