Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Randomize
