All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Randomize
