can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Randomize
