dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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