C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
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We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
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